I can’t believe that a month ago today I was sitting in a hospital bed in a twilight stage from the anesthesia and feeling nausea. I kept telling Erick all day, “I can’t believe I did this. I did it. It really happened.” I spent the next 2 weeks questioning why I did it and will the pain ever go away. Will the nausea stop, will the indigestion stop? Will the pain go away? I can say after a month that yes…yes it will stop and go away….for the most part.
So far, week three proved to be the most challenging. The pain subsided and you are left with the emotional dealings of not being able to eat and reality setting in. Now, as I ended week 4, I am getting into routines, feeling good and the moments of weakness are getting to be few and far between. That doesn’t mean that it wasn’t a hard week. In week 4, you are feeling up to visiting with friends and/or family and what do they have at every turn? Food. This week is when the real challenge comes. Being around a group of people with food and not being able to have even a bite of it. This can become emotionally overwhelming because you can smell it and not eat it. At home, you learn to be in a different room when your partner is cooking and you eat your food and it’s not too bad. This experience makes you not want to be around people for a while because it is still hard. I had a couple days of that sadness this week.
Now, on the other hand, at the end of week 4, I was able to eat my first bites of real food in a month! I am allotted 2 oz of food (or 4 tablespoons); half of which consists of something with protein and the other can be whatever mashed. This is the soft food phase which is mashed, pureed or soft. For my first meal I had tuna with a little mayo and mashed banana. I was surprised that the portion was more than I had envisioned in my head and more surprising than that, I was unable to finish it! I probably ate about an ounce. You don’t want to over due it because I would assume that tuna coming back up would be rather disgusting!!! You have to take 20-30 to eat your meals and then you should wait another 20-30 minutes before you can drink liquids again. I’m starting to get used to that routine.
It’s time for What I learned this week….
Sleeping on your stomach after 3 1/2 weeks feels like you can conquer the world! I have always been a stomach sleeper and not being able to do that has been utter torture!
You really really want food this week and you physically can’t. This puts you in a tail spin of emotions and you hate the world, you want to be alone with your thoughts and a bottle, but you can’t have a bottle, so you drown your sorrows with a couple ounces of water.
Week 3 and 4 become full time jobs in trying to find protein to ingest regularly. After 2-3 weeks of drinking the same shit, the notion of continuing makes you want to gag and vomit. You will spend some money buying different products and not being satisfied. Keep at it. I found a brand called Unjury that so far has been good. I have only had the strawberry in water with some crystal light lemonade powder thrown in and its like strawberry lemonade and I have been able to tolerate that.
You can become irritable in week 4 as a result of all the body changes and emotional issues. Encourage those around you to not take it personal as they can not understand what you are going through. Imagine dealing with someone who is stressed and can not have cake, chocolate, alcohol, cigarettes or bread. Back away slowly and don’t look back for a while…
You finally start being happy with your decision to do this. Not 100% but as you get used to your new routines, you realize it’s not that bad. You are saving tons of money on food and it’s easy to maintain.
All in all, it was a good week. I stepped on the scale and I lost another 3 pounds this week. That makes the total weight loss for Month 1 @ 34 pounds!!! I also took measurements the night before surgery and again today and I have lost about 20 inches all around!
Now is the time to really step it up and start exercising more and kicking this journey into higher gear!!