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Blindsided by Irony

Today’s fun example of IRONY:

Be inspired to write a blog about how we often get blindsided and it’s often for a reason that pays off later.

Then have said blog post of brilliance, completely dissipate from existence with no explanation or warning.

It saved constantly as my fingers stroked the keys feverishly as the thoughts came out faster than my fingers could try and keep up.

But then it glitched and stalled on the page. The blank white screen with the taunting hourglass laughing at me waiting for me to throw the computer out the smurfin' window.

Refreshes made and nothing. The site wouldn't load or work and for 20 minutes, seemed to have been wiped from utter existence. 1 hour with tech support and they had no clue either. Whilst on hold, we try to persevere and work on something else, but each attempt at a new task was meant with more roadblocks and bullshit.

Here’s the crazy thing. I couldn’t even tell you what I wrote in that blog post. I can’t explain it but sometimes I put on headphones and drown myself in the melodic waves of someone else’s artistry that somehow brings words out of me. I will completely zone out and often don’t even realize what I am writing while I am writing it. It’s not until I go back and read to make sure it’s cleaned up.

So yeah, we have no idea what I wrote LOL

So like everything else, we push forward, adapt to the current change in reality and try a new route to the destination……so here we go…..

How often have you found yourself in a situation where something happened and it knocked you off your ass? Never? You are a damn liar! We are not immune to it. Some it could be minor things: Traffic when you are in a rush, lose your keys, had an unexpected cheat meal, etc. For others, it could be catastrophic: A death in the family, a loss of job, only car breaks down en route to work, etc.

We can pretend that we have never once experienced something like this but the truth is, it's pretty much a common staple in the human experience. Everything is not meant to go always as planned because then what’s the point? You always score the 3 pointer at the buzzer? You get every single promotion to apply for? You pay every single bill on time every single month for the rest of your life? Your car has special wings that can avoid every single accident approaching? You have never had a single fight in a relationship?

Here’s the thing. Like I said, we are not immune to it and its pretty much guaranteed in life at this point. What separates the survivors from the victims is the attitude in the moment, the attitude in the midst of figuring it out and the attitude coming out of it on a certain side.

The original purpose of this post was a single incident where being blindsided became a blessing in disguise.

In January, I started a joint venture in a podcast with another person. Terrified about putting yourself out there and having no clue what I was doing, I was at least having fun along the way and enjoying the learning process and the friendship.

After a couple months of slowly building momentum, growing and meeting some amazing people, one day it came to a crashing halt. The rug was pulled out from underneath me and all that work was erased from existence including the friendship as well. Just like we have to adapt in negative changes, we adapt in positive changes as well and what do you do when you are used to talking to someone every day for hours and then literally it just stops with no explanation?

I mean I don’t know about you but I felt lost. After leaving a couple toxic jobs, I was terrified of not having this to keep me busy and staying positive. I was so afraid that without this new routine I got accustomed to, I would fall into a depression from being home all day.

For a couple hours, I sulked and I sulked hard. I questioned everything. I was grieving and I was freaked about different possible outcomes that could come from this.

But then I decided why not keep it goin? Why not try and do this on my own? I know nothing about it, I don’t know how to set up a podcast let alone have the structure and knowledge to navigate through each episode. And how the hell do I find people who want to talk to a little nobody like me?

Well, we should save some of this story for the next book that we are currently in the process of formulating :)

Long story short, a single event knocked me on my ass and almost became an instant self destructing demise. But after you go through the emotional stages, the last stage for me was decision. What is next? How do I handle this? What decision to I make about this specific issue.

That single decision turned into the first episode with Chelsea who became a personal friend online and she continues to share her story.

That single decision turned into making genuine friendships outside of a single episode, chatting and bonding over life and experiences.

Then yesterday, Marcie who was a guest on the show messages me out of the blue that she is in my vicinity and wanted to meet for lunch! I was so smurfin' excited to meet one of them in person!

I drove 30 miles to an outside town I’ve never been to. It seemed desolate and quiet and this city girl couldn’t fathom living in such a small town like this.

But inside that small desolate area was an amazing Mexican restaurant with a very generous and caring staff who were great with us.

Marcie and I chatted like we were old friends, never getting awkward which is so rare for me because I am socially awkward (I know, hard to believe but if you ever notice I ask a lot of questions….well there is a reason LOL)

We had such an amazing time and on the way home, I was listening to a playlist of music I had never heard before from my buddy and like when I write, the melodies intertwined with beats as they bounced internally from ear to ear, bringing a smile to my face and a subtle trance on the way home. I was filled with ideas and thoughts for upcoming stuff and book chapters and I was on cloud 9. It made me reflect on how blessed I have been in the last few months making new friends from all over the country with shared interests, struggles and triumphs. Reflecting on how none of this would have ever come to fruition had I thrown in the towel that day.

This year has been my ultimate year of growth. Yes, 2015 was the year where I finally lost all the weight and got my degree and at the time, I didn’t think it could go up from there but my god does it!

This has become the year of internal growth, mental clarity, dedication and a burning desire to conquer so much shit that it’s almost overwhelming at times and I often find myself burnt out from the ideas and daily hustle.

Just remember that change is often good. It might not seem like it in that moment but give it time to present the whole picture.

It’s like we are living in a Monet painting. Up close, it is riddled with distracting strokes, the images don’t blend or make any sense. It’s appears to be a jumbled pile of garbage made up of tiny mistakes everywhere and you think, "that poor guy. He doesn’t know how bad this shit is."

But then you take a step back. And another step back. And a few more steps back and the more you look at the painting from a distance and can see the whole picture with a different set of eyes you see how every intricate mistake was all part of the plan. Every cracked line and smudged paint was all part of it. Like all along. We were just so consumed being inside of it, we didn’t have a change to step outside and trying looking in from another angle.

So when you are down, stressed, overwhelmed or feel blindsided, take a few deep breaths and just remind yourself that you are a goddamn masterpiece in the making!! It just isn’t finished yet and this moment of weakness you are feeling is merely a single brush stroke on the bigger picture.

I’ll tell you this. I don’t really know what I wrote in draft 1 but I'm thinking it was supposed to happen to be able to write it this way :)

A blindsided moment turned into a future amazing lunch date at an amazing Mexican restaurant in a small town in the middle of nowhere with an amazing soul!

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